My Australian Road Trip (aka Iñaki's Toilet Tour 2009)

We all have done it: jump in the car, start the engine, lower the windows, play some good music and drive!

The idea of hitting the Australian roads on a car had been bouncing in my head for quite a while. This became even more clear when I realized that 'backpacking' has become one of Australia's most profitable tourist businesses. In contrast with Asia, tourist agencies in Oz monopolize most of the attractions forcing the so-called backpackers to sign up for organized trips and package tours. The only way around it (when possible) is renting your own car, but this can be very expensive as a solo traveller. Luckily after one week stuck in Brisbane I met Daniele, Matteo (25 & 23, Italian) and Kevin (25, German). The four of us were determined to travel the 3000+ kilometers that separate Brisbane from Cairns. Thus the only thing left was sorting out our carriage. If you were to explore some of Australia's another-worldly landscapes which vehicle would you choose? Easy, a Spaceship!

Sunshine Coast

During the first three days of the journey we drove up the Bruce Highway taking several detours to visit the beaches. First stop: Coolum Beach (near Maroochydore). The beach was good for swimming but apparently it was even better for sleeping (the Italians set a furtive camp on the sand while I shared the bed in the car with Kevin). In the afternoon of day 2 I was suddenly confronted by an unexpected travel companion that would leave an imprint on the rest of my trip. Something or someone was throwing a party in my stomach and I wasn't invited. It was then when I discovered -and very much appreciated- the comfort of Queensland's public toilets. After a night(mare) in Imbil I woke up feeling better. The first endless stretches of asphalt appeared as we approached Rainbow Beach. This is a very picturesque strip of sand but my guess is that it must be nothing remarkably special in the area - for the locals have decided that the best way to enjoy it is racing their massive 4WDs up and down the beach.

Capricorn Highway
Here one of the funniest moments of the road trip. One of my travelmates -whose name I won't mention deliberately- insisted on visiting Maryborough. The reason was that two weeks earlier he had locked two bicycles (of dubious origin) at Maryborough's railway station. His plan was to pick them up and trade them at a cash converter or something. Unbelievably when we turned up the bikes were still there (despite of the sign that specifically warned of the prohibition of parking at the station). However destiny had a surprise for my good friend. The lock he had used wouldn't open, either he had forgotten the code or it had magically changed. After considering his options the poor fella decided to ask for help at the local police station (!!!). They forwarded him to the firefighers' department. I still remember the epic moment in which the enormous firefighter's truck showed up at the station. It took our heroes less than a minute to free the bikes, which were later sold in less than an hour.

We resumed our collection of pictures adding some shot of the local fauna: fake sharks, kangaroos, beloved dingoes, nasty snakes and crocodiles. As for me, well, I kept collecting credentials for the nomination of Queensland to the "Best Public Toilets Award". By the way, check this out: Salma vs. Iñaki, no match baby!

When our spaceship reached the Tropic of Capricorn we deciced to turn left and head inland. And we drove and we drove, for hours, for days, until the petrol gauge got dangerously close to the red-shaded area. Our effort was rewarded with a mind-blowing sunset at Lake Maraboon, without doubt in my top 5 of beautitul sights of my diversion.

Whitsunday & North Coast
Back from the pseudo-Outback, we drove on to Airlie beach. As I remember it now, Airlie beach is only interesting if you are planning to enrol in a cruise around the Whitsunday Islands. Unfortunately navigating is one of the very few things that "The Shrek" -our Spaceship- couldn't do, therefore we skipped the islands. After another night at one very clean rest(room) area we reached Townsville. With only three days left to reach our final destination we decided not to waste too much time. A quick splash in Paluma's National Park, a visit to banana-heaven Tully and a last attempt to fish something at the Flying Fish Point summarizes our last days.

Cairns & The Great Barrier Reef
14 days and 3178 km after we departed from Brisbane we finally set foot on Cairns. This beautiful and cozy city witnessed another cold war between my stomach's settler and I. Even though my diving trip to the Great Barrier Reef was at the stake, I decided not to use chemical weapons (ie Imodium) in favour of a lactose-free diet. My strategy was successful and on day 15 I was ready to board the Tusa 5. I must admit that the cruise was a little bit over my average budget but one doesn't get the chance to dive at the world's greatest coral reef everyday. I saved my money not buying the underwater pictures but if you're interested you can take a look at this clip (note that I didn't get to see some of those cute fish, but I promise that the coral was still there!). That evening, back in Cairns, we celebrated the end of our trip with a pub crawl. Fantastic end for a fantastic journey!

Interesting things that I've learnt:

• Australia is home to 9 out of the 10 deadliest snakes on earth. Other world-top dangerous creatures that can be found down under include white sharks, box jellyfish, red back spiders, salt water crocs and the drop bear.
• Snakes do have ears but they're covered by skin so they "hear" vibrations rather than sounds.
• Mary Poppins' creator PL Travers was born in Maryborough, home base of the Proud Marys Association, a collective of women from all over the world whose name is Mary, Maria, Marguerite...
• Automatic transmission cars suck.
• Alternative uses for Vegemite outside Australia may include: seaweed fertilizer, big machinery lubricant, mosquito repellent, drop bear repellent, people repellent and all kinds of mean bad-tasting pranks among others.
• Apparently (and luckily for me) an endless supply of toilet paper in public WCs is a constitutional right in Australia.

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Todos lo hemos hecho alguna vez, subirnos al coche, llenar el deposito, bajar las ventanillas, poner un buen disco en el radio-casette y echarse a la carretera sin un destino en mente, solo por el placer de coducir. La idea de recorrer las carreteras australianas en coche (o mejor dicho, en fragoneta) me habia rondado la mente durante mucho tiempo. Lo vi mucho mas claro tras comprobar que, segun parece, en Australia las agencias controlan la mayoria de las atracciones turisticas obligando a los viajeros a pasar por caja para casi cualquier cosa. La unica manera de conservar el estatus de viajero independiente es alquilando un coche. Asi es como conoci a Kevin (25, aleman) y a Daniele y Mateo (25 y 23, italianos). Los cuatro queriamos viajar hasta Cairns asi que nos aliamos y alquilamos una super-fragoneta para hacerlo.

Durante los primeros dias condujimos direccion norte por la Bruce Highway haciendo paradas en las playas. Tanto Coolum Beach como Rainbow Beach son estupendas, una pena que algunos australianos solo las usen para jugar a pilotos del Dakar con sus todoterrenos. Por cierto, fue uno de esos dias que descubri que no viaja solo. Por lo visto algun virus o bacteria habia decidido instalarse en mi estomago y no tenia pensado abandonarme por un tiempo. Gracias a Dios Australia goza de algunos de los mejores baños publicos del mundo, limpios y con abastecimiento vitalicio de papel higienico.

Nuestro viaje continuo hasta Maryborough, escenario de una de las historias mas subrealistas del viaje. Uno de mis compañeros -que prefiere permanecer en el anonimato- insistio en hacer una parada en esta ciudad, con poco que ofrecer - todo sea dicho. Por lo visto el colega habia abandonado dos bicis -de dudosa procedencia- candadas en la estacion dos semanas antes. Su plan era recuperarlas y venderlas en la tienda de segunda mano mas cercana. Para nuestra sorpresa las dos bicis seguian alli cuando llegamos, y esto a pesar del cartel que indicaba que estaba terminantemente prohibido candar bicis en la estacion. Mi buen amigo se las prometia felices cuando el destino se cruzo en su camino. Una de dos, o mi amigo habia olvidado el codigo del candado o este habia cambiado por arte de magia. El caso es que el candado no cedia y mi amigo, tras considerar sus opciones, decidio pedir ayuda en la comisaria mas cercana (!!!). La policia decidio que tal urgencia quedaba fuera de su jurisdiccion y delego el caso al cuerpo de bomberos. No os podeis imaginar la cara que pusimos cuando minutos mas tarde un flamante camion de bomberos hizo acto de presencia en la estacion. Cuatro hombres uniformados -heroes!- estudiaron la situacion y procedieron a la liberacion de los rehenes. La operacion fue todo un exito y tras los agradecimientos pertinentes mi amigo acompaño a las bicis a su nuevo hogar (un cash converter cercano). Epico.

El safari fotografico por las carreteras secundarias de Queensland se cobro nuevas victimas: tiburones, kanguros, dingos (animal a todas luces querido en Australia), serpientes y cocodrilos. Yo por mi parte continue recopilando pruebas y meritos para nominar al estado de Queensland al premio "Mejores WCs publicos 2009".

Cuando nuestra fragoneta atraveso el Tropico de Capricornio decidimos cambiar el rumbo direccion oeste. Surcamos la autopista y las carreteras menores durante horas, incluso dias, hasta que la aguja de la gasolina se acerco peligrosamente a la reserva. Entonces acampamos. Nuestros esfuerzos se vieron recompensados con el mejor atardecer que he visto en mi vida.
De vuelta en la costa, retomamos la Bruce Highway direccion norte. Airlie beach, Townsville, Paluma, Tully y finalmente Cairns. 14 dias y 3178 kilometros despues de abandonar Brisbane por fin alcanzamos nuestro destino. Por si el trayecto en si no habia sido suficiente recompensa, por delante aun me quedaba lo que me habia traido tan lejos: bucear en la Gran Barrera de Coral. En duda hasta el ultimo momento por los consabidos problemas gastricos, mi dieta libre de lactosa dio resultado y aquella mañana del dia 15 estaba listo para embarcar en el Tusa 5. Siete horas de crucero y tres inmersiones me abrieron las puertas del arrecife de coral mas grande del mundo. Todo sea dicho, me defraudo un poco el volumen de peces del punto escogido, sin embargo el tamaño y la espectacularidad del coral compenso el dinero invertido.

Y asi, con unas cervezas de vuelta en el puerto es como conclui el fantastico viaje por la costa este de este maravilloso pais. "Australia, pais donde se come bien y se caga mejor!"