The Adrenaline Week (Part II)
I arrived to Auckland on Sunday evening. I'd barely checked in my hostel when I received a message from two old friends from the south island; remember the Swedish Legolas and Aragorn? Cecilia and Lina had just arrived to Auckland from a trip to the north and were eager to explore NZ's biggest city. We met the next morning at the foot of Auckland's Sky Tower. This tower -built between 1994 and 1997- rises 328 meters from the ground offering stunning views of the city. It was at the top of the tower where Cecilia (or perhaps Lina) pointed at the harbour bridge and said: hey guys, did you know that people actually jump from that bridge? In a different context this comment would need further explanation, however in New Zealand everybody understands that what my friend meant was that one can bungy from the bridge. And to Cecilia and me this meant trouble. During our trip in the south we had agreed that if we ever saw each other again in NZ we would bungy together, no excuses.
- The meaning of the Maori haka.
- That Auckland's Sky Tower is highest free-standing structure of the southern hemisphere!
- That sandals (also known as flip-flops and thongs) and called jandals in New Zealand.
- How to overcome personal fears.
- The real value of consistency and social observation as motivational techniques (I put to practice some of the social psychology theory that I learnt for my master thesis).
- That my kiwi friend Glen does NOT live anywhere near Auckland. Sadly I learnt this the hard way, sorry mate we MUST see each other again in Europe or NZ!
The Lord of the Cola Cao
The world's balance relied on one solid element, a mighty substance gifted by the Gods to all the Middle-earth-landers. They called it 'Cola Cao' or 'the Gift from the Gods'. The miraculous mixture of the substance with cow milk produced an elixir that bestowed immense power to those who drank it. For centuries the substance was secretly guarded inside a golden urn resting in the remote confines of the world, as agreed by the leaders of the Middle-earth-landers. But one day the golden urn went mysteriously missing. The disappearance of the precious dust unleashed a fierce war between the Middle-earth tribes. Surprisingly humans won the battle - which can only be explained by assuming that it was one of them who stole the Cola Cao. Every living ork was terminated. So were giants, except for those whose height didn't exceed the 5m - those were sent into exile in the Lowlands (where one can still see their descendants riding bicycles and swimming in the canals). A few hobbies were spared too, which explains why some people are shorter than the average in some south American countries. The dwarfs were petrified to decorate gardens. The smurfs were reduced to powder and dissolved in water to produce the ink that flows from our pens. Finally the cheerful playmobils - who instead of fighting decided to enjoy the last days of their lives drinking at the pubs - were turned into plastic toys for our children (note the pint-glass shape of their hands). From then on men would own the earth in solitude. 
As sad as the story goes I couldn't help to feel guilty for the atrocity committed by humans. But I was also determined to restore the lost balance. Last week I packed food for a week and set off to cover the last steps to the confines of the world.
My journey commenced with a spectacular motorboat ride from Queenstown to the west end of Lake Wakatipu. From there I commenced a long walk up the Caples valley. Four days that transported me back to the Middle-earth. I saw herds of cows and wild deers -providing only amusement to me- in the vastness of the valley. I saw waterfalls, some as high as 174 m, and I wondered if the giants ever used them as showers. I also saw lakes, the purest my eyes have witnessed and God knows I couldn't resist to try them! But above them all I saw the mountains, snowed peaks so beautiful that it's going to hurt not seeing them every morning. On the fourth day I reached the west end of the valley to discover that I was still 40 kilometers away from my final destination. It was then when two loyal companions came to assist me. My Legolas & Aragorn I suppose, named Cecilia and Lina (30, Swedish) who didn't hesitate to offer me a lift on their car.
In less than an hour we darted into Mildford Sound, the sanctuary where the golden urn had once rested (according to the legend that I just made up). A breath-taking scenery featuring the calm Tasman sea intruding a small section of land flanked by 1500+ meter fjords in all directions. Certainly a legendary place that skyrocketed to the Top 2 most beautiful places I've seen during this trip.
The final ceremony took place in the quiet solemnity of the last cruise of the day (one should never visit Mildford between 10am and 4pm). I took the golden urn of Cola Cao that I had carried for so long in my bag, unscrewed the lid open and spooned the divine powder into a cup of warm milk. I drank half of the cup and poured the other half over the Tasman sea. This tribute to those who perished in the battle fields won't bring them back but it will help to remember, to learn from our mistakes. Never again shall the Cola Cao belong to anyone except to us all!
Author's Note: This was my lame attempt to play a funny version of the Lord of the Rings, a movie that I've never managed to watch (fell asleep twice) and in which I have no special interest other than the fact that it was located in one of the most beautiful countries on earth, New Zealand. My apologize if it wasn't funny after all.
Vaya de antemano que no soy fan de 'El Señor de los Anillos', de hecho e intentado ver la peli un par de veces quedandome sopa a los cinco minutos en ambas ocasiones. Sin embargo y dado que estamos en Nueva Zelanda, tambien conocida como la Tierra Media, aqui va mi cuento para el deleite de los frikis:
-- Cuenta la leyenda que hubo un tiempo en el que el hombre compartia la tierra que pisamos con gran variedad de seres vivos. Por una parte estaban los animales, ofreciendo su carne como alimento, sus pieles como abrigo y su fuerza al servicio de los hombres. Tambien estaban los arboles y las plantas, ofreciendo cobijo con su madera y sus hojas. Junto con ellos tambien existian otros seres: orcos, gigantes, hobbits, gnomos, pitufos y playmobils; todos ellos viviendo en perfecta armonia con el ser humano. El equilibrio universal descansaba sobre un unico elemento, una piedra filosofal, una sustancia magica regalada por los dioses a todos los habitantes de la Tierra Media. Ellos la llamaron 'Cola Cao' o 'El Regalo de los Dioses'. La mezcla del magico elemento con leche de vaca producia un elixir que otorgaba un poder inmenso a aquel que lo bebiese. Si lo tomaba el ciclista se hacia el amo de la pista, si lo tomaba el boxeador golpeaba que era un primor. Para preservar el orden establecido los jefes de las tribus de la Tierra Media acordaron salvaguardar la sustancia omnipotente en una urna de oro que habria de descansar en los cofines del mundo. Esto fue asi durante siglos hasta que un dia la urna desaparecio misteriosamente. La desaparicion desato una guerra feroz entre los habitantes de la Tierra Media. Sorprendentemente los hombres ganaron la batalla, lo cual solo puede explicarse si se presupone que fue uno de ellos el que robo el Cola Cao. Los orcos fueron masacrados. Tambien lo fueron los gigantes, excepto aquellos que median menos de 5 metros, ellos fueron exiliados a los Paises Bajos donde todavia hoy pueden encontrarse algunos de sus descendientes pedaleando alegremente entre canales. Algunos hobbits tambien sobrevivieron en las frias montañas andinas. Los gnomos no tuvieron tanta suerte, ellos fueron petrificados y muchos decoran hoy nuestros jardines con rostro impasible. Los pitufos fueron reducidos a polvo y mas tarde disueltos en agua para generar la tinta que fluye de nuestros bolis Bic. Por ultimo los risueños playmobils, estos se lo tomaron con filosofia y decidieron disfrutar de sus ultimos dias emborrachandose a cubatas en los bares. Ellos fueron plastificados para el disfrute de nuestros pequeños y todavia hoy puede apreciarse la forma del vaso de cubata en sus diminutas manos. Desde el final de aquel infausto genocidio, el hombre ha sido dueño unico de la tierra que pisamos. --
Esta leyenda no es sino otro ejemplo de la atrocidad del ser humano. Una injusticia mas para sumar a nuestro vasto curriculo. Pero yo no estaba dispuesto a dejar las cosas asi, no señor, ya iba siendo hora de que alguien restaurase el equilibrio perdido. Asi pues hace unos dias y al mas puro estilo Frodo Bolsom llene mis alforjas para una semana y me eche al monte para recorrer los ultimos kilometros hasta los confines del universo.
Mi viaje comenzo con un paseo en lancha desde Queenstown hasta el extremo oeste del lago Wakatipu. Desde alli comence una larga travesia de 4 dias a traves del valle del rio Caples que me transporto directamente a la Tierra Media. Vi a las 'bestias', vacas y corzos salvajes en la grandiosidad del valle. Tambien vi las cascadas, algunas de hasta 174 m. de altura, y me pregunte si tal vez los gigantes las habian usado algunza vez como duchas. Tan bien vi lagos, los mas puros y cristalinos que jamas he visto, y Dios sabe que tenia que probar sus aguas! (bueno eso y el odor de tres dias sin ducharme). Pero sobre todos ellos vi las montañas, cumbres nevadas tan bellas que duele despertar por la mañana y no verlas. Y asi, en mi cuarto dia llegue al otro extremo del valle para descubrir que todavia me quedaban 40 kilometros para alcanzar mi destino. Fue entonces cuando dos fieles escuderos acudieron en mi ayuda. Mis Legolas y Aragorn particulares se hacian llamar Cecilia y Lina (30, suecas) y en vez de cabalgar a lomos de un caballo conducian un Mazda. Juntos recorrimos los ultimos kilometros hasta adentrarnos en Milford Sound, el santuario donde tiempo atras se habia confinado la urna dorada que contenia el Cola Cao. El lugar sin duda alguna era magico. Una pequeña porcion de tierra bañada por el mar por el Mar de Tasman en el oeste y flanqueada por gigantes de piedra de mas de 1500 metros en el resto de direcciones.
La ceremonia final tuvo lugar en la intimidad del ultimo crucero del dia. Una vez alcanzado el epicentro de los fiordos saque la urna dorada de mi mochila, abri la tapa y prepare un buen tazon de Cola Cao. Bebi la mitad del tazon (pues bien sabeis que necesito su fuerza) y verti la otra mitad al mar a modo de ofrenda a los que perecieron en el campo de batalla. Se que esto no los traera de vuelta pero al menos nos servira para aprender de nuestros errores y prevenirlos en el futuro. ¡Nunca mas debera el Cola Cao pertenecer a nadie sino a todas y cada una de las almas que pueblan esta, nuestra Tierra Media!
Islander Day 3: Castaway's Fun!
As if still dreaming my eyes opened slowly on day 3 to find my body surrounded by white sand. The sun and the roar of the ocean felt like an angry mum pulling the sheets of a lazy teenager. Five more minutes, please! I needed them, last night was better than yesterday's however I had to wake up several times to fight battalions of crabs attacking my quarters from every imaginable angle.
When I planned this challenge - I mean the Islander game - I conceived it as a 3-day experience. This means that today was my last day here. Yes, one more sunset and I would have achieved my goal.
Last days are meant to be fun. God rested, students party, ex-employees steal pens, ex-smokers smoke... I decided that during my last day in this island I should do all the fun stuff that castaways do. I started my day with a photo-shooting session. The ocean, the beach, my-terrible-looking-self, etc. During the photographic session I noticed that there were some things missing to make a proper castaway. For one my outfit. Where did those tattered clothes go? Nothing that can't be solved in five minute of conscientious tailor work. The second feature missing required a little bit more of work and loads of imagination. Ever since the beginning of the castaway times every respectful wrecker has been known to have a partner, a loyal companion, a soulmate, a friend. Robinson Crusoe had his man Friday, Tom Hanks got emotional with Wilson, but what about me? Well, I've got Mr. ColaCao! (who else). Boy, it feels good to have someone by my side.
After the photos it was time for a swim. The sun shinning in the blue sky and the crystal-clear waters made for a perfect snorkeling day. No big fish though. After a coconut lunch and a short nap I decided to try fishing. Grabbed my rod, my bait and climbed up the rocks. Disoriented fish comprised my initial target. I set the bait that I caught yesterday and sank the hook into the sea. Soon I noticed something pulling the fishing line. Wait. 1,2,3... off we go! Nothing (except for a shiny clean hook). Bastards. Second attempt, something pulling, 1,2,3... up! Dammit! Ok, let's try with something easier: smaller fish swimming amidst the rocks. Here we go... yes, yes, biting, yes, c'mon swallow b*tch... blaaaaast! You stupid son of Nemo! This went on and on until I ran out of bait. Overall catch of the day: two small crabs that didn't make it for a dinner, so I let them free anyway.
When the sun approached the horizon I had time for a last castaway's cliche: the message in a bottle. With the joy of a castaway who knows that the end is close I dropped a few lines hoping that someone someday will remember me. I rolled my message and put it in a bottle. I released it in the sea. I watched it float away, its silhouette shrinking until it became a small point. Then gone.
Congratulations Iñaki! you made it, you survived, you got your answer!
Tras mi tercer amanecer en la isla mis ojos se abieron despacio para descubrirme rodeado de arena blanca. Los rayos del sol y el sonido de las olas del mar imitaban a una madre tratanto de despertar a su hijo para ir al cole. 5 minutos mas, hoy los necesito. A pesar de que la pasada noche fue mucho mas tranquila que la anterior, casi en media docena de ocasiones tuve que hacer frente a ejercitos de cangrejos que atacaban mi mosquitera desde todos los flancos.
Cuando planifique este desafio - jugar a Robinsones - lo concevi como una experiencia de 3 dias. Eso significa que hoy era mi ultimo dia. Un atardecer mas me separaba de mi objetivo. Los ultimos dias son siempre felices. Dios descanso, los estudiantes queman libros, los ex-empleados roban boligrafos y los ex-fumadores fuman. Por ello, en mi ultimo dia, yo me he dedicado a hacer todas esas cosas divertidas que me correspondian como buen naufrago. Para empezar una sesion fotografica. Playa, mar, mis pintas (y que pintas!)... espera, aqui falla algo. Dos cosas para ser mas exactos. Primero mi vestimenta, que ha sido de esas ropas desgarradas? Nada que no se pueda solucionar con 5 minutos de cuchillo y maña. Una vez atabiado como corresponde solo faltaba un detalle: mi compañero de aventuras. Todo superviviente de un naufragio que se tercie ha de tener un compañero de peripecias. Robinson Crusoe tenia al indio Viernes. Tom Hanks en "Naufrago" encontro alivio en Wilson (el balon de volley). Y yo? Pues yo tengo al Señor ColaCao, quien sino! El tiempo vuela en buena compañia.
Tras las fotos un bañito. Cielo azul, aguas cristalinas, dia perfecto para bucear. Un lastima que no hubiese peces. Despues de una breve comida (cocos, claro esta) y una siesta, decidi probar suerte con la caña (de pescar). Con mis aparejos de pesca en ristre me encarame a las rocas. Alli prepare el cebo (los pececillos que pesque ayer) y probe suerte en el mar. Primer objetivo, peces despistados. Al poco de echar la caña senti que algo picaba. 1,2,3... vamos que nos vamos, arriba! Nada, cebo limpio. Segundo intento. Venga que si, 1,2,3... arriba! C*bron de pez, se esta poniendo las botas a costa de mi cebo. Decidi probar suerte en las charcas entre lsa rocas. 1,2,3... traga, traga! arriba! Cajones! Y asi una y otra vez hasta que me quede sin cebo. Balance del dia: 2 tristes cangrejos que devolvi a las rocas pues no hacian ni una sopa.
El sol cayo sobre el horizonte dejandome tiempo para una ultima ceremonia: el mensaje en la botella. Con la alegria del naufrago que se sabe cercano a su fin, deje caer unas lineas con la esperanza de que alguien me recuerde algun dia. Meti el mensaje en la botella y la libere en el oceano. Luego segui la silueta hasta que desaparecio en el horizonte. Felicidades Iñaki, lo has conseguido, ahora ya puedes decir lo que significa ser un Robinson!
Islander Day 2: Noises In The Dark
With the taste of cheap beer fading in my mouth I headed back to my improvised lodge for what should have been a second night of quiet (and sweaty) sleep. I encapsulated my body in the igloo of mosquito net. Like every night since I left home, I played the podcast "La Rosa De Los Vientos" (works better than Valium) and blew off the tiny sparkle of candlelight that kept my pupils from fully open.
It must have been during the first five minutes of the podcast that I heard it for the first time. Knock-knock! My eyes wide open. It sounded as if someone was banging the door or the front wall of my bungalow from the other side. Knock-knock! A second series of knocks made me realize that I wasn't dreaming. This can't be happening, I thought as the muscles of my ass tightened like never before. Sawadee krap! (standard Thai greeting), I replied loud yet fearfully. No answer. I got up to light the tiny candle. Hello? who's there? I sat on the bed waiting for an answer holding the torch on my left hand and the knife on the good one. After five minutes of silence my heartbeat finally commenced a steady descent. I ensured that windows and door were properly shut and crawled back into the mosquito net. Who the hell could be out there lost in the jungle? who would be as crazy (read: stupid) to wander around this abandoned bungalow in the middle of the pitch-black night? F*ck it! whoever he or she is must be much more scared than I am! I repeated this last sentence in my mind over and over trying to resume my sleep. It worked, however I woke up no less than 5 times throughout the night.
A few times in my life I've been so glad to meet a new day covered in sweat as this morning. I run down to the beach (knife in hand) for the routine morning swim. After last night's incident I needed the tranquility than only ColaCao can bring to me. I set an ever exotic breakfast consisting of coconut, (sort of ) milk* and the miraculous cocoa powder. I drunk it up and fingertipped the tasty lumps that scattered at the bottom of the can. After this I proceeded to my day-to-day activities. The number one item on my list for today was to build a fishing rod. I cut a bamboo stick and went up to the bungalow to fetch the fishing line and a hook. It was then, while searching my rucksack, that I heard it again. This time it sounded lower. Knock-knock! The door was open, there was nobody in the porch. Knock-knock-knock-knock! The sound fading in the distance. I run out, this time I had an allied: daylight. I completed a circle around the hut before I discovered the source of the noise: a 25+ cm long nosy lizard! You bastard, you scared the hell out of me last night! I went back inside and cursed myself for being such a chicken. But there was more. As if taking the mother of all the pisses a second lizard (also 20+ cm) materialized in the room. This one had reached even closer to my bed, it was glued to the wall no more than a foot from my pillow. You little f*cker, didn't want to miss the party, uh? I chased it away and went back to the beach.
Although the mystery of the noises had been solved, earlier that morning I had decided to spend tonight at the beach camp. I felt too lucky to have a bungalow and I wanted to know how it felt to be a real castaway even if it was just for one night. So, I collected some stones, some wood and built an improvised bedroom with vistas of the sunset.
Hours later, when the tide went out it was time for me to get some bait for tomorrow's assignment: fishing. I scanned the rocks and found what I was looking for: tiny fish trapped in natural pools. With my mosquito net and a bit of patience I managed to catch a dozen of them, not enough for a dinner but who knows, maybe they are the key to escape my monotonous diet (exclusively based on coconuts).
Dusk broke in a couple of hours ago. I retreated to my camp. This time I managed to set on the bonfire on my first attempt. I've reproduced the mosquito net + poncho mat igloo on the sand. Got the beer, the pen and the notebook. At last I'm writing these lines. The night is beautiful although I cannot see as many stars as the first one that I spent here. It's been a long day, a good one, but long nonetheless. I'm tired, I think I better try to get some sleep. Let's hope I don't get any unexpected visitors tonight. Talk to you tomorrow!
*I forgot to mention this in my castaway's shopping list. Somehow I figured out that I'd need a ColaCao in this island.
Los hechos acontecidos la pasada noche perduraran en mi memoria como algunos de los momentos de mas acoj*ne de toda mi vida.
Con el sabor a cerveza barata todavia en la boca, enfile camino a mi improvisado refugio predispuesto a pasar la segunda noche de sueno (y sudor). Una vez encerrado en el iglu de mosquitera y chubasquero sobre el colchon, me enchufe a "La Rosa De Los Vientos" en mi MP3 y sople la timida vela que habia impedido hasta ese momento que mis pupilas se dilatasen por completo en la oscuridad de la cabana. No habrian pasado ni 5 minutos de interesante tertulia radiofonica cuando oi un ruido inesperado: Knock-knock! Mis parpados se dispararon. Parecia como si alguien estuviera llamando a la puerta de mi pequena cabana. Knock-knock! La segunda serie no dejaba lugar a la duda, alguien o algo estaba aporreando la pared frontal de mi bungalow. Los musculos de mis posaderas se estromecieron como nunca antes lo habian hecho (gracias a Dios no lo suficiente para que aquello acabase en desastre escatologico). Lleno de inquietud (in-)disimulada exhale un saludo en tailandes: Sawadee krap! Me sente en la cama, encendi la pequena vela y agarre machete y linterna mientras esperaba una respuesta desde el otro lado de la pared que no llegaba. Cinco minutos mas tarde mi ritmo cardiaco emprendio un descenso leve pero continuo. Quien podia estar tan loco (lease mentalmente perjudicado) como para andar merodeando un bungalow abandonado en mitad de la junga a esas horas de la noche? (Quien excepto un servidor, claro esta). Quien quiera que fuese posiblemente estuviera mas asustado de lo que yo estaba pues al fin y al cabo yo era el intruso que estaba okupando el bungalow. Me asegure de que ventanas y puertas estuvieran bien cerradas y me repeti mi ultima reflexion hasta que mis parpados calleron por puro cansancio. Esta noche me desperte un minimo de 5 veces.
Pocas veces en mi vida me he alegrado tanto de despertar en un horno. El sol de la manana me propuslo a la playa para mi bano matutino. Tras una noche tan movidita solo existe una manera posible de restaurar la tranquilidad: un buen tazon de ColaCao. Dadas las circunstacias he tenido que improvisar un desayuno de lo mas exotico: coco, sucedaneo de leche (incluido en mi lista de la compra a ultima hora, preveyedo que necesitaria un buen ColaCao en cualquier momento) y como no el oro en polvo marron! Tras el desayuno revitalizador he procedido con mi lista de quehaceres.
My Supplies
 | Life: Quite obvious, the only item that cannot be earned/purchased anywhere (unless you're Super Mario). |
 | Money: Probably the less important one since it can be earned along the way. Hopefully, at the end of the trip I will be able to demonstrate that it doesn't take a kidney to travel the world. |
 | Morale: An important one. I'll be travelling as long as I'm happy. Boredom, tiredness and health problems could affect my morale; to counteract it there are plenty of excting things to do, people to meet... |
 | Cola Cao: The difference between life and death. I run on Cola Cao since I was a child. For this trip I'm carrying just a few fixes for special days. God only knows what could happen if I lose them! |
Tal y como expliqué al comienzo de este blog, retornaré a casa cuando agote cualquiera de los cuatro suministros básicos que necesito: Vida, Dinero, Moral y Cola Cao.
Lo de la vida es evidente, si se me acaba más que volver a casa me traerán (tranqui mamá, que es una broma...). Dinero, el menos importante ya que no es imprescindible y además puede conseguirse por el camino. Moral, este sí es importante. El aburrimiento o el cansancio pueden afectar mi moral, para evitarlo siempre habrá gente y cosas nuevas que conocer/hacer. El Cola Cao, mi gasolina. Me llevo 6 sobrecillos para días especiales, cuando se me acaben vuelvo a por más.